Thursday, May 22, 2008

Today is one of those life seems to be nothing but "one of those days" lately. Utterly bored! Not that there's nothing to do, because there is plenty of work. But that's all there is. Just work, and no motivation, no fun at all. Boring, crazy, dumb people (I hate myself for using the expression "dumb", but I am THAT DESPERATE right now!!!!) that are driving me absolutely crazy and a town - or shall I say the whole country - of NOTHING exciting at all to offer. Of course there are exciting and beautiful places all around me, but I am sick and tired of exploring them by myself.
Change is URGENT! I would have changed my whole life a long while ago, but there are some things that need to be wrapped up here first. And this is no lame excuse for not getting on my butt and do it! It's one of those truths, where one can't afford, financially, to move and get the hell out of here to start all over again! Well, until that happens, I am meeting some cool new friends. Salman Rushdie and his Midnight's children, Chinua Achebe, the Brontee sisters, and other great thinkers. I just wish I could jump into their literary worlds until I could move somewhere and meet real new people. Now I still have to walk through town and meet bitter, evil, ignorant and SUPERFICIAL faces and maybe even listen to them spreading their superficiality into the streets and minds of other people. ..Ah, I wish I was totally immune to them! I wish nothing they say would reach my ears and my thoughts. I wish I didn't have to confront the superficiality and stupidity. I guess no one can ever "escape" from that no matter where in the world they go. Well, at lest, one meets different kind of stupidity....
Whatever there mind is on the road....

haha. Anyway, photography is going very well, apart from not having a camera at the moment. :-) All of them died on me. I guess that's good, too. For some reason, whatever it may be. I've been thinking about what photography even means nowadays. It's changed completely, that's for sure. I was in two photography workshops in the past two weeks. Tomo Jesenicnik, a professional Nikon photographer, was my mentor. Well, he is one of the ol' school photographers, who won't really manipulate a photograph. This is out of the question in his photo-philosophy. He was immediately one of my best friends as he said that:-) Sometimes as I browse through photographers' web sites, I feel anxiety. A lot of photographs seem almost like commercial posters - packed with information, manipulated....

ah, all is well, but photography isn't as "natural" as it used to be.

It's time for a nap. Exhaustion is pressing heavily on my eyelids.

ta ta

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